NORTHERN PLANNER

Naturally, it is replete with proper tea making equipment, including the trusty pot, even trustier Yorkshire Tea and china mug. Just out of shot is some Fortnum and Mason Earl Grey leaf tea that is actually quite amazing and that I'm not an inverted snob enough to hate myself enjoying

You can see the telephone that hasn't been used for about 6 months – it's all mobile these days isn't it?

In the absence of the Head of Planning – who usually sits opposite, for passive aggressive discussions on the minutia of modern music and an ongoing competition for who can build the bigggest mountain of unopened Amazon books -  you can enjoy the spectacular view of the fire exit and the tips of a leafy tree. Apparently green makes you more creative. Tick.

Peer past the desk and you'll spy the most fashionable social media PR type peering over her laptop, pretending to do some sort if 'listening exercise' (whatever that is) while actually abusing me through the medium of Twitter. Just out of sight is her sidekick, part witch, part hippy, part French philospher who insists on drinking tea with honey. That's right, honey. Different strokes etc, but sometimes I weep for the future.

Above the Twitter Twattering,  honey drinking Witches of Eastwick, you'll see some bunting. Not for the jubilee, on no, we're too louche and ironic for that. For something French that happened months ago.

Back to the desk and, predictably, there's the little pile of pretentious books, ostensibly reference for some projects while actually ornaments to make passers by think, "Ooh he's clever!".

If you could peer down, you would see feet sporting sandals, since the chief exec is back and doesn't like people wandering around the agency in bare feet. She hasn't been around for over a week, allowing my 5 toed friends to breathe the free air. Quite the rebel me.

Look around and you see a listed building that used to be a school and was then transformed into 'Players Bar' a drinking establishment owned by the world famous soft rock Gods, Def Leppard.

You too could enjoy the delights of this working environment for a couple of weeks even longer. All you have to do is endure doing work experience (or poisoning young minds as I like to call it) with me. Obviously, work experience based around planning and stuff, but also the chance to learn how to make the perfect cup of tea, correct my spelling, learn about fashion from the aforementioned Witches of Eastwick and do your own Account Planning School of the Web project on a one to one basis.

Any takers email me at your leisure.

One addition, added after original post. I'm not suggesting there will be people clamouring at the door, but there are some criteria to get in. You need to be enthusiastic about planning. To that end, in no more than a thousand words, you need to email me why you want to get into planning and describe your favourite ever campaign and why it's so good (clue, I'm more interested in the strategy than the casting).